I’m feeling pretty anxious about something at work and could use some perspective. For context, I work in an office of about 100 employees. Last year, there were probably only 3 younger employees in the entire office. Over the past year, though, we’ve had a huge growth spurt and hired around 20 new people, most of whom are in the 22–26 age range. Honestly, I’ve loved it. I tend to relate pretty easily to people around my age, and the communication style is a little more casual/lighthearted. It’s been really nice having people at work who I can socialize with and genuinely connect with.The younger group has started doing happy hours, and I’ve gone to several. They’re fun, and I feel like I’ve finally developed a bit of a social support system at work, which has actually made me happier in my job.The problem is that I’m in HR.
Lately, I’ve started feeling anxious about where the line is between being a friendly coworker and being “HR.” People will come into my office and casually complain about things like pay, workload, management, etc. Sometimes it feels like normal workplace venting, but then I start wondering, Am I supposed to be doing something about this? Is this now an HR issue? Am I allowed to just respond as a coworker/friend?
My boss actually called me today and reminded me to be careful when I go to these happy hours. I completely understand why, and I agree that I need to maintain boundaries, but it also made me start questioning whether I should even be socializing with these coworkers at all. I really don’t want to become the person who is constantly thinking, “I’m HR, I can’t say that” or “I shouldn’t be friends with these people.” At the same time, I obviously understand that I have a different responsibility than they do and I don’t want to compromise my professionalism or create an awkward situation for myself or the company.
Is it actually possible to balance being friendly/friends with coworkers while working in HR? Or is it smarter to keep a pretty firm social distance? how do you handle friendships with employees, especially people around your age? Where do you draw the line between normal coworker banter/venting and something you need to treat as an HR matter?
I think part of what’s making me anxious is that I’ve really enjoyed finally having a group of people at work that I connect with, and I don’t want to lose that. But I also don’t want to be naive about the position I’m in.